Monday, April 23, 2007

How Families Are Producing Osama and Cho?

Today whole world is discussing to know how families across world are producing Osama or Cho knowingly or unknowingly. The matter is serious and it concerns one and all. As I talked about disastrous force in human’s life which makes an individual a disastrous person, I shall talk about how contradictions are generated in a very simple life.
Today, in this information age, information is not limited to few selected privileged individuals but is available to one and all at very meager price. In this environment, families need to focus on few of the critical issues while they bring up their children towards some major success and achievements.
In due course of time, we rear so many contradictions in our existence that we make our life miserable. I shall narrate a real life story of a growing individual, in his own words -


“I am working in the Delhi Police. I am staying in one of the posh areas of Delhi. I have four children. The eldest daughter stays in the village and studies in a school in Otava near Agra so that she can learn the old culture of our society for which we Indians are very proud. I have put my one son and one daughter in DPS RK Puram. They are learning all the latest developments of society. They are learning things very fast. They speak in English. They are studying in English. It is a different story that we never speak English at home. My wife joins sometime at my Delhi residence. Otherwise, she stays in the village to look after farming with another son three years old. I have my two brothers and four sisters staying in the village. They are staying in the joint family except my eldest brother who stays separately in the same village. He and his wife are teachers and they have two children. They are studying in the same school where my brother and sister-in-law are teaching.

I am the only advanced and most literate one who could get service outside the village and work in Delhi. I am staying outside and seeing the advanced world but, you see sir, I have not forgotten the village and my ancient culture. I am so proud of my traditions. I still remember when my father refused to allow me to marry a daughter of my senior with whom I fell in love. We saw few movies together. I took her few times to famous Lodi Gardens to understand each other in a better way. Sir, Lodi Gardens is really a nice place to take your not so knowledgeable girlfriend to learn a few basics of love. There are many live examples there to show to your girlfriend. But after all this, finally I married, as per my father’s wishes, a girl from nearby village. My wife is not very literate. She has passed her sixth class from her village school. When she got involved with a boy of the tenth class, her father refused to send her to school so that she should not learn bad things of society. Over and above, it is so difficult to keep our prestige intact if our daughter gets involved in some love affair. My father-in-law that way was very strict. He was disciplined too. He carried out all his family responsibilities in time. He married his daughter at the age of sixteen. My wife is very hard working and sincere. She takes care of my entire house-hold activities. She gets up at 4 o’clock and sleeps at 12 o’clock at the night after everybody sleeps. She has never complained to me about anything.

I am very proud of my achievements. In life, you have to sacrifice a bit to get some prestige. I am very sure that I shall always try to teach the ‘cultural richness’ of my ancestors to my children. Once in a year, I bring my son and daughter studying at DPS, to the village for two months during their summer vacation. I leave them in the village with their mother so that they can learn the basics of the ‘sound culture’ of our village. They do not get a chance to speak in English in the village but I am hopeful that the sound culture which they learn during the vacations will be useful in the long run compared to those who send their children to “Your Kid ‘R’ Our Kids” for summer camp and learn salsa, painting, acting, modelling, horse riding or instrumental music etc.

I want to educate my children with the best of education available so that they can become good officers in some government department and earn a lot of money and prestige. Officers in government departments get lots of prestige and money from the public. At the same time, I want to maintain the village set-up so that after retirement I or even my children can settle there and live a good life in old age. I know there are lots of problems in the village like poor electricity, no medical facilities, no good school or college, no road, no communication and so on, but at least I am very proud of my village. My grandfathers have taught me that I should not sell or dispose off my ancestral property. I shall not do it at least during my time. I am not sure of my children especially who are studying in DPS. Sometime, their talk gives me shivers.”
Today when heinous crime has been done in USA by a small boy of 24 years old, killing 32 people at stretch, this story reminds me some basic queries. The contradictions are more prevalent in the families from third world. However, the families in developed nations if rearing contradictions at home may face these dangers.

My mind kept on dwelling on voluminous contradictions in the life of a common man. How can an educated person marry an uneducated girl? How are the women of a middle class urban society forced to live a miserable life in a village between 4 o’clock in the morning to 12 o’clock in the night? How did the people were taught about the ‘cultural richness’ or ‘sound culture’? Does living in scarcity, indicates a sound culture?

How to spread the message of good living and sound culture in such a vast and contradictory population of South Asia in general and India in particular? You force your children to study English and modernity on one hand and on the other hand you ensure, they learn poverty, deprivation, scarcity and misery. What do we want from a child of nine? Is it not a criminal offence to force your nine-year old son or daughter in such a ‘contradictory microwave oven’? The contradictions of life narrated here are not less than an oven.

The life of the individual is full of contradictions. A person puts himself in such a critical contradiction and makes his own life miserable. Over and above, it is a heinous crime to expect small children to learn English, modern things and old culture simultaneously. It is too much for the individual to cope with the demand from two extremes. It is a crime to expect from a wife to be homely, educated, submissive and modern as well. It is too much a contradiction to have a modern life and keep the old traditions intact.

The common people with minor education and resources are accepting these contradictions in day to day life irrespective of location in the world. But the same things are not observed in a high class family or society. That’s how Rajiv Gandhi married an Italian; Imran Khan, former Cricket Captain, married a Jew; Shahrukh married Gauri, a Hindu girl etc. Examples are plenty, leaving normal middle class people to suffer indefinitely. Is it not a ‘contradictory microwave oven’?

Contradiction has become lately a part of human society. India, Pakistan, Bangladesh, South Korea, Sri Lanka or rather the whole of the Asian region and the whole world of miserable people are the burning examples of these contradictions. Almost 95% of people are badly or dangerously involved in these contradictions. Everyday, they live life in those contradictions. Even the families who have migrated to USA or other European nations are forced to live life with these contradictions. And these contradictions become incubators of suicidal human bomb.
There is no clarity available to them in society. Every person takes various examples of whatever is available and gets some dose of contradictions in her life. These contradictions are prevalent in society in the name of cultural richness, heritage, modernity, broad thinking or vision. A normal human being is not in a position to understand or come out of these contradictions. And in these contradictions, people generate aspirations or so called fatal aspirations.

In these contradictions, I personally feel that Osama or Cho can grow any time, anywhere and at any place. Any family who are forcing these contradictions on their family members may suffer the way Cho family is feeling miserable today. The growth of Osama or Cho is nothing but extreme mis-utilization of magnificent technologies. Earlier governments were stopping Fashion TV to bring moral in the society but when Cho is shown on TV day and night who blocks the channels? No one. When 12 year old boy is shown brutally killing throat of a man on TV, who is blocking that from our children? Various websites are available on 24X7 basis to make a person religious fanatic and hard core nationalist. I feel our families, our children and our youth all are under threat unless we unlearn … and unlearn immediately.

We have to unlearn deprivation fast to ensure that our children do not fall pray of killers on net.

Take Hard Decision in Lighter Moment!

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