Exposition of Indian Lady

Dear Kamekish sir,

So it is quite clear in my mind that I am contradicting you at two places:

1. Mallika Sherawat's decisions are appreciated in the book.

But it could have been some other example who had done something good to the society. This is what I felt. How can a girl who has contacts with many men can set an example for the society? If the society grows in that direction, can we call it a healthy society? Or is there any peace of mind and good health possible, if the society takes the path of such lewd examples? How about Kiran Bedi? Definitely, she can set a wonderful example in all facets of her personality! She has revolutionized the concept of disciplining the criminals in Tihar jail through Vipassana meditation.( For your kind information I am also a vipassana meditator but not regular in my practice !) She could have become a good testimony for all your good words. This is what I feel.

2. Parents should not be heeded at all.

What I felt was that they need not be heeded in the matters they are not at all familiar with. Like the example you had given about a pilot who took the advice of his mother for his career in flight and about which the mother knew nothing! That is why I appreciated that the examples you have given "are very strong" and really valid. (Personally speaking, when I was not allowed to go to college to pursue my higher studies and faced storm, all the relatives "kindly" adviced me to stop my higher education. Discouraged me as much as they could. Otherwise I was known as the only child who heeded the words of elders so well. So they wondered that my rebellion in this regard (higher education) was quite contrary to my good nature. But I never listened to any of their "advices.")

Good, it really paves way not to listen to the parents or elders in certain things. But is it adviseable to come out of their house? Even here I could reallly agree with you. Because, if I had settled there with my parents and relatives I could not have been what I am today. So my own examples were too strong to support your views. That is why I called you a real saviour of women in my earlier comment sometime ago. This may not sound good for gents. Because they enjoy good amount of freedom from their parents and their small sense to underscore the thirst of women to achieve and grow may not allow them to agree with you or me at all! I have no concern for such words at all! I don't even waste my time in listening to such empty and hypocritical advices given by such narrow minded gentle men.

Where I contradict with you? Leaving them behind and forgetting them to settle in a developed environment! Of course that is shocking to me. We may do it in order to change their mind for sometime. But is it good to keep ourselves completely forgetting them? How far we are thankful to these good human beings who had sweat for us till we got our wings to fly?

To tell you something very frankly, after this contradiction, when I pondered for sometime, I did not fail to see the weaker side of my argument. That is, if the parents are so egoistic to deny settlling in a better environment where their children are ready to embrace them without any objection, why don't they change their mind to go and settle with them? If they bring damnation to themselves because of their own negative and narrow thinking who is responsible? Good. Let's all go ahead.

But definitely, the children also should not take any chance of neglecting their parents even when they are ready to settle with them. Here I am strong. Children,(ie. young generation) in the name becoming developed, should not discard their parents as if they are the objects of "use and throw"! Certainly, if they do such negative unlearning they are bound to be condemned. Your book should have insisted on this point, I researched and felt.

Your book is a wonderful and daring attempt to put your index finger on the nose of the conservative ignorant and even educated but hypocritical society! You really deserve a big accolade for your daredevilry. Go ahead wing commander! Command the world to UNLEARN! Here is one such spirit by your side! Thank you.

With loadz of thanks and regards,

Dawn and Dew.

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My Reply to this daring response from an Indian lady,
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Dear Dawn and Dew

I think you are correct. We contradict at two places.

1. Mallika Sherawat’s decisions are appreciated in the book. As far ‘unlearning’ is concerned, this is correct. However, I have mentioned about the contributions of Kiran Bedi in generating wisdom else where in the book which you must have noticed. But then as far as unlearning is to be discussed, I could not get any better example than Mallika at that moment of time when I wrote these lines in 2005 middle. If I had to write these lines in 2007, I could have thought of another Mallika who grew on Mallika and now competing with her and she is Rakhi Sawant. In recent Hot Times of The Times of India, she declares she has better brain than Mallika. Keeping it short, I had no other daring example than Mallika as far as unlearning is to be communicated.

2. Parents should not be heeded at all. This may be correct in most of the cases but certainly I have never said that it is to be done in every case. I have own logic to put across this point. But if parents are ready to unlearn and follow the path of growth and prosperity, there are no contradictions. So I think you have explained with many of your daring examples which many of Indian ladies feel shy in narrating. But you have done it and I hope your messages are going across many Indians ladies for a more conscious and prosper society where parents have a choice of better life. This is the responsibility of all educated children to provide developed life to their parents.

I have commented few of these in Matheikal blog too. I hope you may have seen them.

http://matheikal.sulekha.com/blog/post/2007/11/unlearn-before-you-learn/comments.htm

I do not know whether I am savior of women but thanks for calling me so.

I agree that the book should have been researched further. I hope to do it if I get time and money.

Contradictions are part of learning. It could be the part of unlearning too. So feel free to contradict if you feel so. I respect the emotions of human being. I understand and appreciate individual choices. But then I only say one has to be aware of own potential.

And that is what is unlearning!!

kamekish


Take Hard Decision in Lighter Moment!